Law and Order: UK

This series is so formulaic that it feels like it’s been running for at least as many years as the various US versions.  Senior and junior cop (cuddly and thus unlikely Bradley Walsh and Jamie Bamber) investigate death for 30 minutes minus ad breaks, then idealistic barrister and zealous assistant attempt to prosecute arrested suspect, with occasional advice from senior CPS guy, usually with a last-minute revelatory ‘find’ thanks to aforementioned assistant, and much searching of soul.  That’s the next 30 minutes minus ad breaks, and then it’s all over.  You’ve seen every series in its entirety.

Needless to say, in the interests of serving up both police investigation and legal proceedings in the kind of neat but twisty story arc so beloved of American TV network scriptwriters, TWNHs abound.  Law-breaking is universal, so the crimes may adapt readily enough to the UK, but law-making differs quite a lot.  The sight of the CPS running around chasing suspects is not quite as ridiculous as the path-lab heroes and heroines of 'Silent Witness', but it's not far short.  As for confidentiality, or knowing basic rules such as disclosure of past misdeeds to your brief before taking the stand - forget it. 

The new series has even lost the charismatic (still charismatic when wet) Ben Daniels, currently wowing them at the Donmar, and also the lovely Bill Paterson.  Instead we have Dominic Rowan, who may be currently wowing them with his ‘no sex please, even with Romola Garai’ at the Royal Court (why the hell are we writing a blog about TV and not theatre?) but has here about as much screen presence as David Cameron.  Oh and Peter Davison has the Bill P part.  Alesha (zealous assistant played by Freema Agyeman) doesn't seem to have noticed that the only two people in her office have changed.  In something so rigidly plotted, maybe we won’t notice either....